What does it mean to be a woman? Dealing with menstruation and menopause

When a girl is born, it is natural to expect that she will go through menstruation and then eventually through menopause. Though looking at the tiny bundle of joy, the thought does not really enter a mother's mind. Even if it does, she thinks there is so much time for all that.

Most girls are not taught to deal with menstruation in a natural healthy way, and so they grow into women who have trouble dealing with their periods, who suffer PMS and have vague ideas of what menopause is going to be like.

By saying that most girls are not taught to deal with menstruation in a natural healthy way, I am not talking of physical hygiene, etc; I am talking of the attitude that girls have towards their period. Do we as mothers teach them the joy of growing up to be women, or do we pass on our own negative beliefs about menstruation to our daughters? Do we teach them that it is "such a pain to have your period", that it is such a "bloody curse"? (excuse the puns please) but a girl will most often get her ideas about women, and the roles and responsibilities of women from the prominent women in her own life. A girl weaves her ideas based on her first hand experience of life. Have you ever complained about how unfair it is to be a woman, or how men treat women badly etc? Then it is only natural that your daughter will grow up with those beliefs. Are you happy to be a woman yourself? If you are not, don't expect your daughter to be any different.

I am asking you here to take a look at your own beliefs and knowledge of stages a woman's life-cycle. Do you have a clear picture of it, or is it a vague idea or a blur? And if we as mothers, aunts, care-takers or teachers do not know our own life-cycles, how on earth can we prepare to deal with it?

Quite simply, menstruation is the threshold where a female makes a transition from girlhood to womanhood.

Many mothers who have had their chats with their pre-teenagers will know that bringing up the topic of menstruation will bring forth a major evasion of the discussion, or statements like "yes, I know all this, the teacher told us in school, " or yes I know what you are telling me, I heard it from my friend" whatever. It is rare that the child will actually sit down and listen to her mother. And most mothers will only deal with what happens physically during a menstrual cycle. Nobody prepares you for the emotional whirlwind that starts within you at the mention of this change.

It is also at this point that most mothers realize the need to impart sex education to their off-spring, but most do not get around to it.

The sub-conscious mind, tells you at a sub-conscious level that once you start menstruating, your body has reached the child-bearing stage and emotionally you are not ready to deal with that just yet. How could you be when you are still a child yourself? So you spend the first few years fighting the idea, then you get kind of used to the idea that "periods are inconvenient" and before long you come to the stage where you are going to stop having periods which heralds the "end of an era" so to speak- and are you ready to deal with that?

Through out their lives, many women manipulate their menstrual cycles, by taking pills, to bring forward or postpone the cycle, to avoid pregnancy etc. but this will eventually play havoc with your health. Though the menstrual cycle is such a natural part of being a woman, many women have a tough time simply accepting it.

While most women think that they will be glad to stop having periods, that they will heave a sigh of relief, the ones on the brink of menopause-are not so ready for it, they would rather continue to have their menstrual cycle for a bit longer rather than deal with menopause. Menopause means another set of major changes in your body and your life. It also signals that you are no longer in your youth. Medically also there is the threat of increased risk of heart dis-ease, osteoporosis and the rest of the illnesses that seem to come as a package deal with menopause. Again, menopause becomes a scary change.

While there are many remedies available to ease these transitions, I feel they will be easily made if you are ready to accept them as part of life. And you can do away with the need for all the dis-eases that are associated with it.

Make it a habit, quite early in life to listen to what your body is telling you. Follow your cycles. You will know instinctively when there is a change. Many women who are in touch with their inner selves have said they know the exact moment they conceived a child. When you have kept a track of your own body cycles over the years, you can tell when you will start making the transition from menstruation to menopause. Menopause does not arrive out of the blue. Your body will give you signals that change is taking place, gradually. It may begin with one delayed cycle in a year, or one off-beat cycle in a year, then the time span between the off-beat cycles will start to reduce, but you will only notice these subtle changes if you have been keeping track of what your body is up to. When you feel you are approaching menopause, you can start preparing to welcome that change in a healthy manner. You can tell you mind to start accepting the change. You can start reading up information on the subject. Make small changes in diet to increase the intake of fruit and vegetables, so gradually you are preparing your body for it.

When the mind is prepared to accept change, it can make things very simple for the body.